HELL

15 May 11 (Sunday night)

While at work tonight I thought I saw a reflection at the window of my jail tier.  When I turned to see who it was, there was no one there.  It seemed too quick for anyone to have gotten out of my field of vision.

This was quite creepy. I felt uneasy.  Jail – always a place where the negativity and bad vibes are so dense you can almost feel it on your skin.  To me this just seems like a place that should be haunted.

Really I’m pretty sure there is a simple explanation to what I saw (or thought I saw).  A trick of light fooling my tired, midnight shift retarded brain.  Maybe it WAS a co-worker and I didn’t turn as quickly as I thought I did.  Who knows?

But why isn’t this place crawling with ghosts if they do in fact exist?  I’ve been here for 7 years, working a majority of it on the midnight shift.  I have yet to experience a blood curdling story about a groaning shackled specter hovering in a darkened stairwell.  Or a pale spirit hanging from the upper deck’s rails “reliving” his last earthly act.

How about this for a wacky theory: maybe the type of souls that would choose to haunt the likes of County are quickly dispatched to hell.  They used up their allotted amount of tormenting others in this lifetime.  Ok all you rapists, murderers and thieves time to play Beelzebub Monopoly.  You have drawn the “GO DIRECTLY TO HELL” CARD.  Do not pass go do not collect $200, and no hiding in little Timmy’s closet.

I sought absolution a fraction of a second too late.

I expelled my last breath with contempt for that life, that world.

Little did I know what I thought was pain in life would be like a picnic compared to what was coming my way then.

The momentary darkness was obliterated, replaced by light.

Not a soft light filled with peace and joy, but a painful light of fire that burned first my eyeballs and then my brain.

I tried to scream but my mouth was melted shut.

He, It would not allow me to scream.  It wanted all the pain contained inside.

A scream was not a release It would afford me.

The pain was all consuming.

Every bit of me was engulfed in fire from the surface of my skin to the marrow of my bones.

This physical torment went on for what seemed an eternity.

Perhaps the Devil has limits or He just grew tired of my agony.

I was given a brief period of relief when the pain dulled from pure agonizing torture to a simple pain I would associate with having all your arms and legs cut off with a dull blade with no anesthesia.

What came next was a different kind of horror.

It was like living a dream, the worst nightmare imaginable.

I watched and sometimes participated as ungodly, gruesome acts were committed against everyone I ever loved.

If the physical torment he put me through felt like forever, this felt like forever and a day.

He, It has left me be for a second time.

Left me to wonder what is to come next, and the time after that, and the time after that…